Affair Healing Blog

Can Pornography Lead To Adultery?

8/7/2018

Question: I think my husband has an addiction to pornography. Is there a relationship between using porn and having an affair?

This article is a summary of our answer to a question posted by a caller in an Open Care Session.

3 Steps Toward Reducing Your Affair Conversations

2/7/2018

One complaint I frequently hear from people who had an affair sounds something like this: “My spouse won’t quit talking about it. I’m trying to be patient, but it’s getting to the point that I dread coming home because I know another list of questions will be waiting. They’re not even new questions; we talk about the same thing over and over again.”

I encourage betrayed partners to take control of their affair conversations by following the following three steps.

The Cost of Affair Repair

1/2/2018

Photo Credit: Deja Photo From Lens To Picture Flickr via Compfight cc

A word to those of you who've had an affair...

I met with a couple who were desperate to determine whether or not their marriage was salvageable. She had recently discovered evidence of repeated sexual communications with other women over the past year and suspected there might be more to the truth. While speaking privately with me, he admitted a history of unfaithfulness in previous relationships and expressed a desire to break this pattern once and for all. In the counseling session, he told her the same thing.

Her response was full of wisdom, expressed in a way that I'd never quite heard before. Here's how their conversation went.

When Will The Tears Stop?

12/5/2017

I begged God to help me get through the grief. He was so good to comfort me and to restore my hope as I prayed. Before I knew it, I was going about life again and even enjoying it. I would begin to find my rhythm and to embrace the life I had come to know that included the big A in it, only to be slammed up against [a] wall again within a matter of days because something triggered my crushed heart and made it start bleeding again.

If Your Marriage Dies, Don't Pitch Your Tent In The Cemetery

11/13/2017

We usually expect our marriage to last a lifetime. What starts with promises of faithfulness and endurance, we believe, will survive any challenge "for better or for worse." Most marriages do; some even thrive. But many die in ways never anticipated.

When the death of a marriage is a mutual choice between two partners, grieving its loss may be a short-term process. The decision to end their relationship often follows a period of prolonged suffering, making divorce feel like relief. Similar to a funeral, partners make the appropriate arrangements, pay their final respects, bury the marriage, and move on with their lives.

But a marriage killed by betrayal is not so easily mourned.

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