What Counts as Cheating… Really?
Are Your Boundaries Unclear?
This podcast episode explores how couples often hold very different ideas about boundaries and betrayal. What feels harmless to one partner may feel like a deep violation to the other. Through expert insight, survey data, audio sketches, and real-life examples, this episode examines why these mismatched definitions of cheating create confusion and conflict—and how couples can find clarity together.
What actually counts as cheating? A kiss? A message? A “like” on an ex’s beach photo? In this episode, Tim Tedder explores how couples define (and often misdefine) the lines that shape trust. Through candid street interviews, audio sketches, survey results, and insights from affair recovery specialists, he reveals why some boundaries feel universal while others depend entirely on a couple’s unique agreement.
Listeners will hear from Dr. Erin Weaver, a psychologist who works with clients in non-monogamous relationships, offering a fascinating look at how trust can be negotiated differently while still maintaining the same need for honesty and consent.
By the end, you’ll understand that boundaries aren’t about controlling behavior—they’re about defining what safety, respect, and loyalty mean for your relationship. Because when it comes to trust, the rules only work if you both helped write them.
LINKS and EXTRAS
Couple’s Exercise: Clarify Your Relationship Boundaries
More information about Tim Tedder’s new resources for involved partners.
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Dr. Erin Weaver
Dr. Weaver works with children, adolescents, and adults in individual and couples therapy, as well as psychological evaluations. She has experience addressing depression, anxiety, trauma, substance use, sexual, and identity concerns. Trained in trauma-informed therapy and EMDR, she also practices from a kink-informed perspective, offering knowledgeable support to those exploring their sexuality and diverse relationship styles, including consensual non-monogamy.
