Unshakeable: Strong Lessons from Hard Experiences
Finding Her Way Through Unexpected Circumstances
Suzanne Leydecker built a life that looked good from the outside: a husband at Goldman Sachs, children, a home in New York. Then one night, over what had been an ordinary date-night dinner, he told her he was leaving. He'd already arranged for his mother to fly in and help her pull herself together.
In this conversation, Suzanne talks candidly about the months that followed—the summer she buried herself in fun to avoid the pain, the late-night deck conversations where she realized he was deciding whether to stay or go, and her decision to tell him to follow his heart rather than beg him to choose her. She also opens up about what came after the divorce: years of repeating the same broken patterns in new relationships, shaped by a childhood in an emotionally volatile home where she learned to cry so no one would yell at her.
Suzanne and Tim have an honest, sometimes pointed exchange about a question that shows up often in affair recovery conversations: how much responsibility a betrayed partner should take for a marriage's breakdown. Suzanne pushes for a version of accountability that includes her own contributions, while Tim challenges the idea that unmet needs explain infidelity. It's a rich back-and-forth, and listeners are invited to sit with the tension rather than expect a tidy answer.
Suzanne now works with women on what she calls her three pillars: personal responsibility, saying no when it's not a "hell yeah," and treating themselves and others with kindness. She writes about her journey in her book, A Woman On Top: My Journey of Self-Discovery Through Love and Money.
LINKS and EXTRAS
Episode Page: https://www.affairhealing.com/podcasts/064
Suzanne Leydecker’s website: suzanneleydecker.com
Listen to Tim’s conversations with his ex-wife: Part 1, Part 2, Part 3.
Sign up for our Weekly Newsletter for encouragement and information about recommendations and new resources for affair healing, relationship growth, and personal change.
Suzanne Leydecker
Suzanne Leydecker is a fierce-love coach, author, speaker, and mother who works to help women become bullet-proof: keeping the promises they make to themselves, learning to say no, and letting go of taking things personally. Her background in marriage and family counseling, paired with a certificate in Spiritual Psychology, shapes her holistic approach to guiding women through self-discovery. She shares her own journey in her memoir, A Woman On Top: My Journey of Self-Discovery Through Love and Money.
At the core of her work is a simple but demanding idea: personal responsibility. Suzanne teaches women to hold their boundaries, find their purpose, and say no so they can say a full-hearted yes in love, life, and business. The goal isn't just self-protection; it's building the kind of internal strength that makes healthy, fulfilling relationships possible, both with others and within themselves.
