podcast 105 "A Couple's Affair Healing Story"
Tim Tedder talks with Tim & Lori about their journey of recovery from Lori's affair.
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Transcript Excerpt:
...Tim T: So, your three points are really important ones, I think. You stopped trying to control Lori and in doing that realized that whether she chose you or not, whether your marriage survived or not, you were going to be okay. And when you talked about pursuing a friendship, there was something in you that moved to love her in a different way than you’d been loving her before. It was certainly something you hadn’t been experiencing for a while.
Lori: Definitely not.
Tim S: The kind of love that we're talking about, the kind of friendship we're talking about. isn't a friendship which tries and manipulate control or judge. It's a friendship that says, “I'm proud to know you; go be all you can be.”
Tim T: There's no magic answer in all this; there's no one thing that you or I, despite our stories, can give someone and say, “Oh, you're dealing with infidelity? An affair going on? Here's your solution!” It’s complicated. It's messy. And we spend a lifetime moving towards a healthy us and healthy relationships. But you both, individually and together, have learned a lot through this process and you will continue to benefit from that.
As you’ve shared your story more publicly, I know there are people coming to you asking for help and advice. What is the important thing that you want to share with others who are dealing with the same thing in their marriages?...
Transcript Excerpt:
...Tim T: So, your three points are really important ones, I think. You stopped trying to control Lori and in doing that realized that whether she chose you or not, whether your marriage survived or not, you were going to be okay. And when you talked about pursuing a friendship, there was something in you that moved to love her in a different way than you’d been loving her before. It was certainly something you hadn’t been experiencing for a while.
Lori: Definitely not.
Tim S: The kind of love that we're talking about, the kind of friendship we're talking about. isn't a friendship which tries and manipulate control or judge. It's a friendship that says, “I'm proud to know you; go be all you can be.”
Tim T: There's no magic answer in all this; there's no one thing that you or I, despite our stories, can give someone and say, “Oh, you're dealing with infidelity? An affair going on? Here's your solution!” It’s complicated. It's messy. And we spend a lifetime moving towards a healthy us and healthy relationships. But you both, individually and together, have learned a lot through this process and you will continue to benefit from that.
As you’ve shared your story more publicly, I know there are people coming to you asking for help and advice. What is the important thing that you want to share with others who are dealing with the same thing in their marriages?...
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