Download: Looking for Healing and Growth

An exercise for couples who need help turning away from a critical focus. Created by Tim Tedder.

This exercise focuses on the positive contributions you and your partner have made toward creating a strong and satisfying relationship. If it has suffered significant damage, it can be easy to see everything from a negative perspective. Instead of just focusing on the problems, consider the possibilities by recognizing the positive contributions each has made in the past, then look at recent and future efforts that can strengthen your relationship.

Doing This Exercise Alone: If you are struggling with a negative view of your partner, try doing this exercise privately. When completed, decide whether your partner might be encouraged if you shared some of the results with them.

Doing This Exercise Together: If both partners agree to do this, each should take time to thoughtfully complete the exercise privately. When finished, encourage one another by sharing the thoughts you came up with.