Recommended Resources for Affair Issues

Books

	Getting Past the Affair: A Program to Help You Cope, Heal, or Move On — Together or Apart Douglas Snyder, Donald Baucom, and Kristina Coop Gordon Getting Past the Affair guides you through the initial trauma of an affair so you can understand what happened and why before deciding how to move forward. This compassionate book offers support and expert advice from a team of couple therapists. If you stay with your spouse, you’ll find realistic tips for rebuilding your marriage and restoring trust. If not, you’ll discover effective ways to recover personally, avoid lasting scars, and pursue healthier relationships in the future. Info/Buy »
	Not "Just Friends": Rebuilding Trust and Recovering Your Sanity After Infidelity Shirley P. Glass Glass scrutinizes affairs and offers well-defined guidelines, including tips for determining how vulnerable individuals and relationships are to temptation, and prescriptions for keeping relationships "safe," repairing betrayal-induced damages and recovering from the trauma. Info/Buy »
	After the Affair: Healing the Pain and Rebuilding Trust When a Partner Has Been Unfaithful Janis Abrahms Spring Clinical psychologist Spring, writing with her husband, draws on 20 years of experience treating distressed couples as she explains how both the unfaithful partner and the betrayed one can confront their doubts and fears about recommitting, constructively communicate pain and anger, restore trust, renew sexual intimacy and forgive. Info/Buy »
	Surviving an Affair Dr. Willard F Harley, Jr. & Dr. Jennifer Harley Chalmers A Christian-based guide to understanding and surviving every aspect of infidelity—from the beginning of an affair through the restoration of the marriage. Info/Buy »
	Shattered Vows: Hope and Healing for Women Who Have Been Sexually Betrayed Debra Laaser This book offers tools that help women struggling with sexual betrayal make wise and empowering decisions. It is inspired by the author’s personal journey through betrayal, her extensive work with hurting women, and her intimate marriage two decades after the disclosure of her husband’s infidelity. Info/Buy »
	Forgiving and Reconciling: Bridges to Wholeness and Hope Everett L. Worthington, Jr. Psychologist and counselor Everett Worthington, the leading Christian researcher on forgiveness, says that forgiving is a gift we give to others. True forgiveness is accomplished through a careful process of understanding both the offense and the offender and taking active steps to forgiveness. In this insightful and practical book, Worthington provides a strategy and a wealth of resources for moving toward forgiveness. Info/Buy »
	Torn Asunder: Recovering from an Extramarital Affair Dave Carder There is hope for recovery from the devastation of extramarital affairs. Dave Carder, a pastor and counselor, provides an overall recovery process from sexual and non-sexual affairs. Info/Buy »
	The Divorce Remedy Michele Weiner Davis Weiner Davis pays special attention to issues of infidelity (see chapter 10), depression, midlife crises, and "passion meltdowns," showing how basic relationship skills (like understanding and patience) can reverse even the most dire marital scenarios. Info/Buy »
	Close Calls! Dave Carder With eye-opening stories, clinical insights, and up-to-date data, Dave Carder reveals what people caught in affairs learned the hard way—and want the rest of us to know. For example, every spouse has a "Dangerous Partner Profile" of the kind of person who tempts him/her. Info/Buy »
	10 Lessons to Transform Your Marriage John M. Gottman and Julie Shwartz Gottman Known for decades of marriage research, the Gottmans provide vital tools—scientifically based and empirically verified—that you can use to regain affection and romance lost through years of ineffective communication. (See chapter 2: Will We Ever Get Over Your Affair?) Info/Buy »
	His Needs Her Needs: Building an Affair-Proof Marriage Dr. Willard F Harley, Jr. Marriage works only when each spouse takes the time to consider the other's needs and strives to meet them. This book identifies the ten most vital needs of men and women and shows husbands and wives how to satisfy those needs in their spouses. Info/Buy »

Other Web Sites

• Marriage Builders: How To Survive Infidelity
  Articles and resources to help a couple move through the various stages of recovery.
• Truth About Deception: Advice about Lying, Infidelity, Love and Romance
  A group of scholars, scientists, and working professions sharing information about why people lie to, and cheat on, those they love.